Finally a new post

I have lately realized that although my faith has grown tremendously over the last few years, it is still so small. I'm getting really worried about Chaz not being able to find a job. I know Chaz will always find something (as he's already doing tons of side jobs), but you know me...I HAVE to worry because it's not permanent instead of just being grateful that he HAS side jobs.

I have also dealth with worrying over my kids. Ok, I know we all worry over our kids, but this is like a gripping worry that something terrible will happen to them like they will be diagnosed with a terminal illness or die in some terrible accident. Call me crazy, but I really do worry over these things. When I start worrying it just becomes this gripping fear and I have to find reassurance in the Word or just with prayer. I find it ridiculous how much I worry, but I have a feeling I will always have a hard time letting stuff go. I envy people who are so carefree and can hand stuff over to God so easily. Or those who can hand it over to God and leave it there for more than 2 minutes. Ha! It's a constant thing for me. The other day in church in Sonora during a quiet time of prayer I just layed all of worries at God's feet. And then Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday (you get the picture) I found myself doing it again.

I feel like lately I've had to own up to my fears and realize that nothing earthly (husband, kids, family) can protect me from any of them. Only God can give me the peace I really need and only He can protect my kids the way I can't.

On a lighter note, I'm still loving being back close to family. I don't think I'll ever grow old of it. Mom's birthday is this Sunday and I think we're going to do dinner for her Saturday night. I've missed just being around for family birthday nights.

Tru turns one in one month! Is that crazy or what?! He's started taking little steps. It's so cute because it looks robotic because he's still really wobbly. He throws his 'fits' by lunging himself on the floor from the crawling position and lunging to me instead of crawling (it's actually really hard trying not to laugh at it because it's so cute). Or he bangs his head on the floor (very cautiously I might add - he gets his head really close to the ground and then bangs...haha!). His thumb is still his best friend and I think we'll have a deal getting him to stop that, but for now I'm just enjoying how cute it is and not WORRYING about it. He has two more teeth coming in and they have given him fits. Poor baby!

Caleb is still obsessed with tractors so no new news there. He literally has them out on the floor all day long and plays with them ALL DAY LONG. I love the way he loves his tractors. He's so funny. On the movie "Cars," there's a part where Lightning McQueen and Mater scare the "tractors" (or cows is what they're supposed to be on the movie) and they tip up on their backs (you know...like cow tipping). Caleb plays that out with his tractors. He makes me "honk" at the his tractors and then he goes "mooooooo" and tips them up on his back. It's hilarious to watch. Still trying to potty train Caleb. Yes, STILL. Any suggestions, anyone? He's go pee on the potty, but not the other one. He ASKS for a diaper (so he knows he has to go) and I willingly give in (only because the doctor asked me to play along since it was probably a matter of control). But it's been a while since then. He still wakes up from nap and nighttime with a soaking wet diaper. Hmm...what to do. Trying not to WORRY that he'll be pooping in diapers in Kindergarten. Ugh.

Dad was saying the other day how funny it is that he's never whiney or fussy with him or mom, but as soon as Chaz or I walk in out comes the fussing. Dad said "Maybe it's because I never say 'no'"! Haha! Probably...and because kids have a natural tendency to save up all the whining or tantrums for mommy and daddy. Yay for us!

Moving, "Wowa," and Poppers

The "transition" phase of moving has been hard, but we've done it before and, honestly, isn't life ALWAYS a transition? That's the conclusion I've come to anyway. You can't just wait around for the chaos to end. I've just had to learn (and am still learning) to live life midst the chaos. It's calming to know that God IS in control even when life is crazy and He IS big enough for all of my problems! "...take heart, for I have overcome the world!"

If y'all could be in prayer over the right job...or ANY job for Chaz. I feel like we took a huge leap a faith moving without a job and it's scary, but I know God will grow us through it. That's definitely something I've learned in my time in Oklahoma - that God grows my faith through all the hard circumstances. I've questioned 'why' a lot in the last couple of years, but I can say that my faith 2 years ago and my faith today has changed for the better. I really didn't understand it before, but I know now why I was in Oklahoma for this long and why everything that happened happened...sort of. We never see the big picture but God does and I feel like he's done something huge in my life in my time here. It just makes me excited to see what else God will do!

I am so happy to be near from sisters and parents. I feel happier here. I know that I shouldn't depend on them for my happiness and I don't, but they do make things a lot better. Ha! Being so young with two young kids is definitely a time to be near them.

I'm copying a pasting a story my mom (who the kids call "Lola" (grandma in Filipino since we grew up there) wrote on our family blog about Caleb the other night. It's hilarious:

"Yes, I'm hearing "Wo-wa" alot nowdays. Caleb has a hard time saying his l's, so Lola is "Wo-wa". So, cute, but we are helping him put his tongue in place to say an "l" correctly from time to time. Tonight Erin had promised him he could play with the playdough after he ate. Of course as soon as the last bite was swallowed, he ran over to us and said, "I want to pway with the pway dough...I want to pway with the pwaydough!" Erin said, "Ok....put your tongue here and say "L"...pLaydough! Being in a BIG hurry, he said, "L-L-L-L, pwaydough L-L-L-L Pwaydough!" So cute!
Okay, I'm headed to bed....it's time for me to "way" my head down on my piwwow" Love that boy!
Kristi....or more affectionately know as "Wo-wa"!"


It was so funny!

Chaz is out getting Caleb's hair cut since the warm weather here is more so than it was in Oklahoma. I like it shorter, but everybody seems to like it longer. I guess it's because I'M the one that has to comb it every morning and make it look somewhat decent. Ok...I have to admit that I really don't comb it EVERY day...you know, if we're not going anywhere what's the point, right?
Tru is sleeping soundly in the playpen in our room. Yes, OUR room. Chaz, me, and Tru are in one room since we're staying with my parents. He's been doing well. He goes to bed at 6pm or sometimes a little later and then wakes up sometimes once at night to eat and wakes up at 7am. He cried for a short period last night since I think he can hear us when we roll over or turn in bed. He also takes 2 naps during the day. I know...I'm blessed. And I count my blessings for sure. Caleb was certainly not the best sleeper - and still isn't. He still wakes up at night. I get up more with him than my 10 month old. Ha! Occasionally we'll get a full night out of him.

Ok, well Chaz and Caleb just got home and they had stopped by Academy after the haircut and got poppers (those firecracker popper things) so I think I'll go watch them be silly.

What a mess!

What a mess! Ash and the kids and I drove into San Angelo Friday evening and Chaz stayed behind to load the trailer with his parents. On their way in late last night at about 11:30pm, Doug's (Chaz's stepdad) truck broke down...the truck pulling the trailer with all of our stuff in it. Chaz was following him in his truck. It broke down close to Abilene (between there and San Angelo) so they stayed in a hotel in Abilene. They are still there as of now. They are going to change the fuel filters, which is all they can really do on their own. They are hoping that is the problem (filled up on bad diesel or something) because, if not, then they will probably have to wait until Monday for a mechanic. Ugh! Please pray that things work out!

Other than that, I'm ecstatic to be back in San Angelo! The kids are loving playing with their cousins. Caleb keeps asking when we're going "home" and I keep having to explain that we sold our house in Oklahoma and that somebody else lives in it now. Lola and PawPaw's house is our home right now until we buy a new house. He's still a little confused, but I guess he'll catch on eventually. Oklahoma City was all he ever knew because he was so little when we moved so it's understandable that he's confused. Truitt is doing well. He slept awful the first night here...he was coughing and I think just a little off schedule. He slept great last night, but then Caleb woke up 4 times. Ha! I think they get together and plan to wake me up on alternate nights. I guess it's best they don't wake up at the same time...trying to find the positive here.

Better go blow dry my hair before the little one wakes from his nap. Be in prayer please!

Packing

Well Chaz was disqualified from the firefighter job for now due to a number of things. He was disappointed, but if you know Chaz then you know that he just rolls with the punches. He's excited to retry again beginning of 2011. Until then, be in prayer for a more permanent job until then. When we move to TX we'll be staying with my parents for about 2 months. I feel like we're intruding so hopefully it's no longer than that. We're so grateful for them! We're excited to be closer to family!

Less than 2 weeks to closing day and I've been packing like crazy. I feel like there's still so much to do, but I'm down to where I really can't pack anymore because we need it to live the next 2 weeks. Frustrating.

Will keep you posted...

SOLD!!

We had our house on the market for 4 days and it sold for full price! We are so thankful! Closing in 5 weeks...eek! That means packed and moving in 5 weeks without a job. I mean...not like we didn't move up here without one. Just be praying for a temporary job for Chaz until this firefighting job, hopefully, comes along.

Moving On...

We're meeting with our realtor tonight and we're going to list the house. We just decided that it'd be easier to be in San Angelo during this whole firefighter process and Chaz can get any job to get us by (scary, but he always has been able to provide for us so I'm not too worried). It is kind of a step of faith because the firefighter position isn't a sure thing yet. So we're trusting God.
This house is just kind of holding us here because if it weren't for it, then we'd probably just move.
Anyway just be praying for a good job for Chaz in SA to hold us over...and for the sell of our house in the Lord's timing.
On a lighter note, the Bachelor finale is tonight and I'm sooo excited (I know I'm ridiculous, but I don't care).

We were finally able to make it to church yesterday for the first time in a while (between sicknesses and being out of town) and it was great. The sermon was actually geared toward single people, but Sunday School was good. We're doing the I Promise marriage study and the lesson was really good. It was about communiating and the different stages of it in a marriage. I think that's something that a lot of couples struggle with seeing that girls, generally, talk more and NEED to talk with their husbands to feel close. Chaz and I struggle with it because he would much prefer to just say 2 words a day and me, well, I just can't stop talking. Anyway, I got a lot out of it.
Ok I'm writing this on my tiny phone and now my hands are cramping up. Hope all is well.

Trip to San Angelo

On our way to San Angelo Friday night we had quite an eventful trip. We had just passed Lawton, OK and, going 75 mph, we hit an ottoman. I know...it sounds weird, but there was a black, leather, matte ottoman in the middle of the road and in pitch black night Chaz didn't see it until the last second. We smashed into it and it was soooo loud. Chaz slammed on the brakes and pulled to the shoulder with this ottoman attached the front of our car. We sat there in shock for a second and then Chaz got out and saw that our car was smashed in and the radiator busted. The ottoman was also totally destroyed. The girls that lost it eventually came back and got it. The furniture company should pay because they didn't even strap it in!! I'm not going to explain every detail that happened because this story would be 2 pages long, but basically a police took Chaz back to Lawton to rent a car, courtesy of Jim and Ashley (thank you SOOO much!) while Caleb, Tru, and I waited in the car on the shoulder in pitch black. I was sooo scared, but was driving to stay brave for the kids (that's the ONLY thing that kept me from breaking down). That and the scripture texts from Ashley. A tow truck hauled our smashed car back to Lawton and we'll deal with all of that later.Anyway, we finally got on the road and everything was fine. Our 7 hour trip turned into a 10 and a half hour trip. Thank you all for your prayers and I'm certainly counting my blessings. Things could have been so much worse. Pray for Chaz right now. He's taking the civil service test for firefighter on about 3 and half hours of sleep!God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in time of trouble. Psalm 46:1